What is cultivating your life?

click to see video.

Words of Wisdom

"My joy is not derived from the flawless execution of my goals. My joy each day is derived from the person and work of Jesus Christ on the cross." ~ C.J. Mahaney

Man Night

My good friend Randy posted this over on his blog...

"Several summers ago a few friends and I started what we called “Man Night”. We met once a week through the summer. At these gatherings we would eat meat (preferably cooked over an open fire) and talk theology. It was a simple concept. But, to this day, it is one of the best things of which I have been a part. We all loved it. It was a forum to learn and enjoy what it meant to be a man..."

I encourage you to click the link and read the rest of his post. Man Night for me was one of the most forming experiences, outside of my immediate family, that has happened to me over the past 5 years. It was such a time or encouragement, growth, and laughter that all of us came away changed. Part of the glory of it was that the format was so simple. There never was any complex flow charts as to who was leading that week, we never had to run a formula to figure out when we were meeting, and there never was any discipleship manual outside of scripture that we followed. Yet out of the simplicity we grew.


I'd venture to say that one of the key reasons we grew was that it struck a nerve in us all to answer fundamental questions. What does it mean to be a man? a leader? a person God has called? a husband? where do we go from here? How do we handle conflict? Huge life shaping questions discussed over cooked meat.

This was not the drinking buddies, they were not the gentleman's club of old, nor were we all looking for escapism. We understood that the result of us intentionally doing life like this resulted in us sharping one another. In Randy's post he mentions some great quotes from G. K. Chesterson. Again I'd encourage you to read them. All this to say...

Recently God has brought in my path man after man who quietly is asking big questions. Big questions that have trajectory altering answers. I wonder what it would look like if just for a summer a group of men would meet with the determination to grill meat and sharpen each others lives. For a season, for our lives, for our wives and children, for our church and our savior perhaps God is calling us to grow some N.U.T.S. (non-negotiable, unalterable terms)

Perhaps more to come...

Friday Foundation

Hallelujah it's Friday. With my Sundays basically Monday my Friday becomes my Saturday. Time to relax, recharge, and review the past week. Sabbath for me is getting my foundation in order. Here's a snapshot.

Emotional Foundation

• Time to sit and stare out the window. To remember that God is God and I am not God.
  
• Time to connect with my wife.
  
• Time to snuggle with my daughter.
  

Physical Foundation

• Time to work on the yard. (yes this is actually rechageing for me)
  
• Time to wash the dogs.
• Time to wash all the pollen off the porch.
  

Spiritual Foundation

• Time to be quiet
• Time to pray
  
• Time to read

Fall out...

A student who was on the retreat weekend we just got back from emailed me this. Thought I'd share...

Encounter With God

On a quiet plantation,
I met with the Lord
And gazed at the beauty
And never grew bored.

At night, the stars sparkled
And at day, the sun shone.
The Holy Spirit came
And never left me alone.

The sun set on the marsh in
Orange and pink.
Like it was my friend,
It graciously gave me time to think.

I thought about life.
I thought about Christ.
I thought about His sacrifice
And then, in joy, began to cry.

Out of commision.

Whew today is the first day i've had to breath in a long while. All last week my bride's family was in town. It was great to have a full house yet unfortunately it happened on one of the busiest weeks i've had in a very long while. Trying to juggle time with family, time with my 6 week old daughter, and time i needed to put in at work was maddening. However I feel like i just crossed the finishing line of an emotional, and spiritual marathon. Now just collapsed on the couch.

This past weekend was the Confirmation Retreat 09. You might have noticed my twitter blowing up. From the moment we stepped off the bus we knew God was up to something. We began on Friday night where most retreats end up and climbed from there. I'll probably post more later on this but we'll just say that after returning at noon on Sunday and seeing a bunch of 8th graders on Sun night back at youth group ready to pray for and encourage students younger then them was humbling. This class really turned a corner in that they took the teachings, owned them, and were more then ready to lead their fellow students to the foot of the cross.

So after a busy week, retreat weekend, youth group Sunday night and staff this morning I'm exhausted. Time to crash.

That's the update.

Exhale

I fully realize that I've been phoning in blog post over the last week. Before you cast judgment let me explain. So the sickness i came down with 3 weeks ago never really went away. I felt fine but ended up with bronchitis. Maybe I'll try a neti pot to help with my sinus crud. The good news however is that I'm feel a lot better just in time for the weekend.

This past week was rough not just health wise for me. Let me explain... I'm not sure why or to what ends but I've been feeling something is up with me. I know that sounds vague I wish i could be clearer but the best analogy i can use is that I feel like a clay pot who was glazed, painted, crafted and useful now reduced to a lump of clay. Soft, moldable, potential but just a lump. It's interesting because God has been teaching me about refining. That there are seasons of climbing and rest, trials and triumphs. This season has been marked with so much joy and change that it's distilled me back down to the lump.

Looking at this season of clay I have to reflect that if given the choice between lump and beautiful pottery I'd have to choose lump. My tendency is pride when i feel everything is under control. Where as a lump I'm just clay in the hands of the potter. Cliche possibly but ringing true in my life this morning.

My hope is that this weekend is going to be about exhaling. For a healthy living thing there has to be some aspect of letting out. For me exhaling means taking time to look out the window and remember it's not about me. It means getting my home in order so it becomes my fortress and castle. My place of refuge. It means reflecting on the past and dreaming about the future. I think it means dusting off some old pots, filling them with rich black dirt and transplanting some winter weary plants into new fresh soil.

Inhale...exhale

Suffer the Little Children...

This comes by way of the Trinity Learning blog...

"J.C. Ryle comments on infant baptism and the spiritual state of children, and, I think, gives some sage advice on how to tend to our children’s souls."

"

Let us observe, for one thing, in this passage, how ignorantly people are apt to treat children, in the matter of their souls. We read that there were some who “brought their little children to Jesus so he could touch them and bless them, but the disciples told them not to bother him.” They thought most probably that it was mere waste of their Master’s time, and that little children could derive no benefit from being brought to Christ. They drew from our Lord a solemn rebuke. We read that “Jesus called them unto Him, and said, Allow the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not.”

The ignorance of the disciples does not stand alone. On few subjects, perhaps, shall we find such strange opinions in the churches, as on the subject of the souls of children. Some think that children ought to be baptized, as a matter of course, and that if they die unbaptized they cannot be saved. Others think that children ought not to be baptized, but can give no satisfactory reason why they think so. Some think that all children are regenerate by virtue of their baptism. Others seem to think that children are incapable of receiving any grace, and that they ought not to be enrolled in the Church until they are grown up. Some think that children are naturally innocent, and would do no wickedness unless they learned it from others. Others think that it is no use to expect them to be converted when young, and that they must be treated as unbelievers until they come to years of discretion. All these opinions appear to be errors, in one direction or another. All are to be deprecated, for all lead to many painful mistakes.

We shall do well to get hold of some settled scriptural principles about the spiritual condition of children. To do so may save us much perplexity, and preserve us from grave false doctrine.

The souls of young children are evidently precious in God’s sight. Both here and elsewhere there is plain proof that Christ cares for them no less than for grown-up people. The souls of young children are capable of receiving grace. They are born in sin, and without grace cannot be saved. There is nothing, either in the Bible or experience, to make us think that they cannot receive the Holy Spirit, and be justified, even from their earliest infancy. The baptism of young children seems agreeable to the general tenor of Scripture, and the mind of Christ in the passage before us. If Jewish children were not too young to be circumcised in the Old Testament dispensation, it is exceedingly hard to understand why Christian children should be too young to be baptized under the Gospel. Thousands of children, no doubt, receive no benefit from baptism. But the duty of baptizing them remains the same. The minds of young children are not unequal to receiving religious impressions. The readiness with which their minds receive the doctrines of the Gospel, and their consciences respond to them, is matter of fact well known to all who have anything to do with teaching. Last, but not least, the souls of children are capable of salvation, however young they may die. To suppose that Christ will admit them into His glorified Church, and yet maintain that He would not have them in His professing Church on earth, is an inconsistency which can never be explained.

These points deserve calm consideration. The subject is unquestionably difficult, and one on which good men disagree. But in every perplexity about it we shall find it good to return again and again to the passage before us. It throws a strong light on the position of children before God. It shows us in general terms the mind of Christ.”

Relational Apologetics

Found this interesting over at the Resurgence site....

"So by all means, engage with a person’s intellectual questions (what we might call rational apologetics). But recognize the need for relational apologetics. We need to show people that it’s good to live under God’s reign (Deuteronomy 4:5-8). We’re to be a light to the nations. As Blaise Pascal put it, we need to make people want to believe our message before we can persuade them that our message is true.

And pray. Ultimately, only God can open blind eyes."

Not a bad thought for the morning. I wonder what that Pascal quote means for youth ministry?

What i'm learning...

For more go here

More advetures in parenting.

So last night Abbie gets up and is feeding in the living room. I have no idea what time it actually was lets call it 3 AM. My bride is up and I fall back asleep. A short way into the feeding Lisa calls out for some assistance, startled out of a deep sleep I hit the ground running, make it to the door only to find that BOTH my arms are asleep. I am unable to grasp let alone turn the door handle. Lisa thinking I'm asleep she's calling louder which only exasperates the situation. Finally I get enough movement back in my arms to twist the handle. Incredible.

100 Questions for Students to Ask Their Parents

I've been pondering how to open the lines of communication between parents and teenagers as of late. What I've come to conclude is that if the goal is to get families to study scripture together on a regular basis first there needs to be open channels which allow both conversation and listening. A way i've wanted to try is to buy a Jenga set and write a bunch of questions on each of the sides of each of the blocks. Once you pull a block out you get to ask the one of open ended questions. Such as...

This question list is from Family Education.com by way of a great youth ministry blog by Tim Shmoyer.

52. Over your lifetime there have been a lot of different kinds of music. What is your all-time favorite? Why?

53. What have you said to me that you wish you hadn't?

54. Did kids ever make fun of you for any reason? What do you remember best?

55. When you were younger, did you ever drink too much and get sick? If so, how did that happen?

56. Would you get upset if I wanted to live in another country when I was grown up? Why or why not?

57. There are two kinds of weddings: big fancy ones and small private ones. Which do you like?

58. Did you ever run away from home? If you did, why did you do it? If you didn't, did you ever think about it? Do you remember what the issue was?

59. What are your all-time favorite movies? Why?

60. What kinds of things make you sad?

61. If you could be any female sports star, who would you be?

62. Do you believe men and women ought to be equal partners, or should the man be in charge? Why? Did you and Mom/Dad talk about this before marriage?

63. Did you ever get jealous of someone?

64. Do you think people are born intelligent, or can they be made intelligent?

65. Would you admit to me if you were afraid of something?

66. Do you think there should be a death penalty for murder, or should the worst possible punishment be life in prison? Tell me why you have this opinion.

67. Do you think it is ok for a man to be the person who stays home with the kids instead of the woman? Why or why not?

68. Why do women shave their armpits and men don't?

69. If you won the lottery, what would you do with the money?

70. What makes you like one of my friends? What would make you dislike one of my friends?

71. Have you ever thought of adopting a child? Why or why not?

72. What did you get in trouble for when you were a kid?

73. Did you ever have a teacher who picked on you?

74. What was the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to you?

75. Is my personality the same now as it was when I was younger? Tell me how I am the same or different.

This i think will do two things. First it will mandate that a specific time is set up and dedicated to communicating and second it will provide some structure and continuity to the conversation. It's not the final step in this journey but so many parents I come across are looking for just the first.

Little Congregations

"It is religious training in the home that appears to (best predict adult church attendance): family devotions as a child are the best predictor of adult attendance, followed by seeing one's parents read the Bible at home, and after that, by parents having read the Bible to the child."

~Robert Wuthnow

Inspiration for the week...

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat."

Theodor Roosevelt